Is it true that if you are too good to people around you, they will take advantage on you?
Regardless of good or bad, they will always be bothering you with something and getting close to just to seek your attention and use you for that purpose.
Can money buy your heart?
When someone knows what you like to eat and drink, or simply buy something just to get you close to that person, do you think it will work between the two of you?
If someone loves you more than anything and you don’t love that person in fact you don’t even developed any feelings on that person, do you think it will work?
Basically I don’t believe in love.
What is the word LOVE really means?
To me it is just about the feelings that infested on that person or something that you really like.
For example, you just bought a brand new hand phone and you like the model, the functions etc.
You have been holding on to it for about few months or more than suddenly you saw something that looks better and even have more extra functions than your current hand phone. You had been thinking whether you want to get it or not. In other words you got feeling for that phone. When the day goes by the feeling for that current hand phone gradually fades away. You had been eyeing on that new hand phone and when the time comes you get it and the old hand phone you either keep it or you do something about it but you will definitely leave the phone unattended.
Do you understand what I am getting at and does it make sense.
I mean it is just my point of view that I am looking at the whole situation and I find that it is all about the feelings. If it stays and you continue to stable it will last but if you cannot than it will gradually fades away and thus putting you in a dilemma position.
I always said that I will always love my girlfriend and my love for her will never dies but sometimes I asked myself, is it true?
Am I cheating myself by saying this?
Or deceiving myself?
But one thing I can assure that I still have feelings for my girlfriend.
She still lives in my heart and there is no room for other girls.
I am afraid to be loved or go into another relationship.
Am I too overprotective to myself?
I know to myself, no other girls can ever replace her.
She is very special and precious to me but I still cannot bring myself to take care of her.
She had never complained to me when she is with me for the past 4years.
She is not with me now and she will never be with me but our memories will always stays with me and I will treasure it.
I don’t blame her and I have never hated her.
I am regretting for letting her go but I will never get back to her. It is not because I don’t have feelings for her but I don’t want to hurt her anymore.
Most of the times I am selfish towards her but I hope by letting her go she will find her own happiness gradually. I am sorry girl.
Both of us know that this is the best solution.
Now, after going through a lot, I have decided to turn bisexual.
Although I still have feelings for girls I am avoiding myself to be too close to girls.
In fact sometimes I feel weird when a girl touches me.
Am I really turning gay?
I asked myself sometimes, whether I really want guys or girls.
But now I guess I know what I really want.
I want a guy to love me and take care of me.
I want to fuck around with guys and I am already started fucking around with guys because guys are BASTARDS including myself.
Not all the guys are bastards, but to whom I have met and meeting soon.
They are everywhere and once they are hook, it is time for payback.
I don’t want to hurt another girl and I know how it feels to be being hurt.
The feeling is extremely painful.
Till today, I still don’t know what I really want.
One thing I know that I will never ever fall in Love again.
I am afraid to be hurt and don’t wish to hurt another party.
I am not bothered if my friends or whoever never accepts me for what I am
Now because I don’t live for others but I live for myself.
It is my life and only one person has the right to end it.
The one who created me
God
And to those who really used me for money purposed or other thing,
You will not be punished by me, I will not curse you or whatsoever but you will face the consequences sooner or later.
Most of you know where my weak point lies and I will not change it because it born with me but I will avoid those bastards and bitches who are trying to get close to me.
I will avoid those morons.
naruAsuki_black24 screamed "JAY ROX!!" at 7:38 PM
